Reading Eyes and Body Language: Some Tips

Published: 06th June 2009
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"Look at me: I've got a case of body language", Freddie Mercury



Can you attract another person with your body language? According to the studies of human communication 55% of information is conveyed with gestures and mimic, 38% is passed with the aid of frequency of speech and intonations, while only 7% is passed through the meaning of words. Who taught us to speak like this? Was Darwin right about our ancestors? Maybe, but this is not a matter of this article. The matter is: how exactly can one person attract another with body language, is it just like Freddie sang it some years ago?



Looking in the eyes. When we are engaged in a business conversation, we are usually focused, and it feels like we are looking straight into the eyes of our counterpart. In reality our eyes cannot stay fixed, they scan the face of a person along a tight closed path: left eye - middle space - right eye, and so on. When we are more relaxed, like, for example, we are talking with a friend, eyes still follow the cyclic path, but it is not that tight anymore. Our eyes scanning his (or her) face along an upset triangle with a base slightly below the eye-line and the vertex at the person mouth.



A joyful, flirting chattering makes the eye scan area even wider. This time, especially if any sexual interest is present, the center of the area will be at the lips of the person you are talking with. So, if a person you are talking to seemingly cannot lift his (or her) eyes from your lips, you better know this person is likely already kissing you in his (or her) imagination. How far you want to proceed in reality will be now up to you, since you already got the signals.



Ape me, baby. How body language can show a difference between a light, playful and a strong, passionate sexual attraction? The passion can be revealed through total mimicking of the object of desire. Meaning of it? Probably, to show that if you copy a person, you have or aspire to have a lot in common with him (or her). The origin of this signaling behavior can be a bit deeper, but how can we tell it now? Good news is that we can use it. Of course, such thing should be used moderately, without getting into complete copycatting, when all features, good and bad alike are reproduced: this can be perceived as a mockery. Also, it is always good to hold at least for a minute, before taking your turn on repetitive gesture.



Eyebrows greeting. Lift your eyebrows if you want to show a person your sympathy. It will be nice to get the same sign in reply, since its meaning is "I like you too". This language is in our genes, not in dictionaries. Who knows how many generations of our predecessors used this sign as a signal "I am your friend and you are welcome here, there are enough room and food in this cave for everyone, feel free to join us!"



Follow the eye sight. One of the most general and clear statements of body language is watching motion of another person. If you do so, you must have an interest toward this person. If that person notices your gaze and moves toward you: the feelings are mutual. This might be a good moment to switch from body language to a real conversation.



Wink me back, baby! Have you ever exchanged winks with someone? Wink is a sign of an interest and attraction. No surprise that it is used in the dating networks as an invitation for a chat. Same is in the offline world. If you see someone who is interesting to you, wink her (him). Got wink in reply? Start talking.









Des has one Ph.D. and one M.S., which are irrelevant to the major subject of his writing: relationships, personals and dating. To contact Des, see his other articles and/or access library of e-books and other materials on online dating, finding your match online, writing personal profiles, meeting single people and keeping healthy relationships, or for single parents web dating networks, visit Orbiana Web Dating Depot .


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